Saturday, May 26, 2007

CLINGY GALS AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT THEM...

I noticed this interesting post on another blog about women and why they sometimes feel or get "CLINGY" and thought I would share it. (OF course it also applies to clingy men). I know I personally do not like to be smothered and yet I want to know without any doubt how my partner feels about me. I agree with this post because I believe as long as any partner feels secure in the relationship and there is no doubt how the other feels about you....it eliminates the need to be clingy. Only when one withdraws and pulls back for whatever reason...which in turn causes doubt...does a person turn into into Saran Wrap.

I've noticed something over the past month or so that may, or may not, help you. Most guys hate clingy women, and from my own experience, I think I know why a lot of women become clingy.

Clingy women often have a low self esteem, are not secure in their situation, and lack self confidence. So in order to help a woman become less clingy, give her more attention and make her feel secure. How, you ask? Like this...

GG makes himself available to me 24/7 - honestly. No matter where I am, or what he's doing, he tells me to call him if I need him. Basically, he puts himself on call. Guess what happens? I become secure, and don't feel the "need" to call him. Seriously. I know he's there, and wants to be there, so the need to cling to him is gone. I don't call unless I absolutely need to, and that's rare.

He also holds me, and tells me that it's going to be ok when I get upset. He reassures me, in a supportive rather than fatherly way, that it's all ok. He doesn't condescend me, or make me feel like a child. He validates the fact that I'm upset, and comforts my emotions. Guess what happens? My self esteem increases because I feel like my emotions are validated, making the need to call him, less.

It's simple things that only take a little work, that will help ease a lot of the drama that women tend to carry. If a woman feels secure, cared for, and confident in her situation, she won't be as clingy. Ok, I'm talking more about myself here, but hey, if it helps, great!

I've found that men who are more secure with themselves tend to be more "caring and sensitive" towards a woman's feelings. This is helpful because it allows him more freedom to enjoy a life of his own.

GG can go out with the boys, and I don't even bat an eye. He makes me feel secure enough that I don't worry about what he's doing, because there's no need to. He's sincere in his actions, and that goes a long way.

AND for women who are guilty of being one of "those women" ...you know....the "Nice Girl..." Too clingy, too nice, always changing their plans to accommodate the man...If you want to assert more authority and get over your clingy needs....this book may be of interest. YES..."WHY MEN LOVE BITCHES"....the author here showing you how to create a new "bitch" which is essentially the acronym "BABE IN TOTAL CONTROL OF HERSELF"....could make for an interesting read no?

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Saturday before Memorial Day...



blue because this was how my day began

I called Grandma C. today. She is recovering from total knee replacement surgery and is spending some time in rehab. She sounded pretty good but had just finished therapy so she was in some pain. When the nurse came around to ask her if she wanted some pain medicine she said yes.

We had a nice talk. I really miss being able to just run over and visit with her whenever we feel like it. We still could now but she is a lot farther away than 7-10 miles. AND Noah has not felt too well the last couple of days. I think the stuff in the air is bothering him. Today he had a slight fever and I have been treating his allergy symptoms. He sounds like he may be feeling a bit better now though because I can hear a lot of activity coming from his room.

I have had a very exhaustive night and start to my day but it has improved greatly. It will take a little longer for my physical condition to catch back up with my emotional one. Nerves can take their toll. I am a bit better about how I allow it or not to control my body but in reality...if nerves want to beat the living shit out of you they will regardless.

I have done a lot of thinking and a lot of talking to God. That is nothing new for me on either count actually. Time to reflect on things is always good and can be very fruitful even if painful.

My AC keeps kicking on and I think I may have it set too low. I am freezing my butt off but don't crank the thermostat up so it won't kick on as much. I think it is set at 68 which is actually pretty cool and normally does not bother me or Noah. I am sure emotions and hormones are in part making me freeze today!

I placed an order with GNC online. A GNC store is only about 1 mile from where I live. I could have just went in person and got all the stuff I needed...but my shipping was free and this spared Noah having to wait around on me to ooooh and ahhh....however...this time round the shipment has gone all over the place. It was actually in Ohio 2 days ago but then they sent it to Indianapolis, Indiana.....now it is back in Ohio again and in my city....so it says I should get it by the 30th? WOW....seems like FED EX screwed up somewhere.

A house down the street was auctioned off today. I expected the streets to be lined up with people and bidders but it wasn't. Only a handful showed up. I wonder who won it and how much it went for. Of course I also don't know what condition it was like on the inside. The outside does not look too bad though.

My landlord told me that when the plumber came here in the winter he came back to tel him I had the place fixed up really nice..."LIKE A PALACE" was his exact wording. I don't know if I would go that far but it made me feel good to know others thought it looked nice. I am sure my landlord is aching to get a peek in here but every time he wants to come around I have the place torn apart again like right now....I am reorganizing and moving boxes back to the garage into storage and finally trying to make something of the office area. WHAT a process and parts of the house look like when I moved in almost. BOXES all over! That in itself can be a bit depressing...but I am getting there.

Well this entry is boring and I doubt that many out there really care what I am doing with my day anyway. I could relate all my personal stuff here...which sometimes I do reveal tiny bits and pieces...but then it would no longer be "personal."

AND I now have cramps......we know what that means. No wonder I have been such a big bawl baby!

TMI!!! I know...I know...see ya got some personal doodah regardless.

despair

It fills me tremendously today....even though I somehow...magically...with faith in GOD.....remain hopeful.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Focus....Believe......You CAN do anything...

"There is an invisible box that we have created around ourselves, which defines our horizon. Things within this box are within reach, achievable, see-able, safe, touchable, believable, feasible, possible. "Outside this box is a region beyond our wildest imagination. Things in this domain are too much to handle or contemplate. They are beyond reach. We rarely think about things that lay awaiting us in this outside box, so we never end up busting thru our own self-imposed barriors." - Usiere Uko

the power of this clip isn’t so much about the idea of “giving it our best” or the ideal of persistence as it is in the PROOF that we can EXCEED any self-imposed limits through internal vision.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Time...

Infinite yet finite...
We take for granted there will always be a tomorrow
Another moment after we finish what we are doing right now
Caught up in our daily routines and work
Forgetting what is most important in our lives
And the reasons behind why we work at all
Sometimes failing to nurture our relationships with our loved ones
Believing we can always make up for it later
We will just "make" time later
Not realizing "time" is something we cannot create more of
We spread ourselves so thin we have little left to offer at the end of the day
And for what?
Another dollar that we will likely not keep?
A television show we feel we cannot live without watching?
Just another hour online and you'll be right there?
The moments that make up our lives and the lives around us are fleeting
In the blink of an eye many years can pass and you can be caught unaware
Left wondering where the time has fled
Regretting the memories you willingly chose not to make
Filled with a sense of longing and lacking
Questioning what you are missing and why you are unhappy
Looking around you see the little ones now grown
You look in the mirror and barely recognize the face looking back
A glance across the table you see an empty chair
Suddenly remembering the absent lover
Who could bear your lack of time for them no longer
You think about visiting a close relative
Then remember they have passed on
Left very alone and empty
It is then you realize....time is all you have


Copyright ©2007 Melinda A. Napoletano

Monday, May 21, 2007

Walk of the Fallen Soldier...

WALK OF THE FALLEN SOLDIER

Marine's last request starts Memorial Fund

PHILADELPHIA - Five days before Lance Cpl. Adam C. Conboy was killed in
Iraq, he inspired his own memorial fund.

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During a Sunday morning phone call from the Anbar province, he described staying 20 men per room in an old schoolhouse, packed into bunk beds in the scorching heat. The stench, he said, was overwhelming.

He asked his mother if she could send clean sheets — 40 sets of them, one for each member of his platoon.

"C'mon Mom, get Operation Bedding going," he joked.

He was killed the next Friday, May 12, 2006, by non-hostile fire. He had been in Iraq eight weeks.

Friends told his mother to expect flowers to start pouring in.

"I told people I didn't need flowers," Mary Conboy said. "In lieu of that, I took donations to get the bedding Adam asked for out to the guys."

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Operation Bedding has since grown from a son's spontaneous quip to a mother's tribute to her fallen Marine. Mary Conboy runs a homespun charity effort from her backyard, sending troops in Iraq packages that contain everything from bedding to sweat socks to canned tuna.

Adam Conboy's platoon got its packages by July, and the company that replaced it received the next shipment. Schools began sending donations, and Mary Conboy started getting requests from different military units interested in the care packages.

But shipping the bedding, toiletries, snacks and books is costly. Mary Conboy estimates she spends $1,000 to get a shipment to Iraq.

To help with the cost, neighbor Donna Palmer decided to turn a housecleaning flea market into a fundraising event.

"I benefit because then I get rid of all the junk in my house," she said, "but really I'm helping a dear friend fulfill her son's last request."

The event scheduled for Saturday, Armed Forces Day, was to feature about 50 vendors, a motorcycle parade, a color guard salute and live music.

It was to be held in Gorgas Park, in the city's Roxborough section, around the corner from Adam Conboy's childhood home. The goal is to raise $10,000.

Charles Conboy, Adam's father, said the funds that keep Operation Bedding afloat are a distraction for him from the pain of losing his son, as well as a distraction for the troops in Iraq "from what's over there, at least for a couple hours while they rip through the packages."

In a DVD sent to the family, Adam Conboy's corps members describe using baby wipes from the packages when they had no running water for bathing and receiving shaving cream just as superiors were demanding they dry shave beards thick from days of growth.

"There was mad fighting over those pillows," one Marine said, "fighting for them, fighting with them, everything."

Mary Conboy said pillows and pepperoni sticks are the troops' favorites, and sometimes the goodies serve a practical purpose.

One Marine told her about meeting an Iraqi child while he had candy in his pockets.

"You show me where an IED is, and I'll give you the candy," he told the child, who led him right to one of the explosives.

"It was on the route where they would have gone that week," Mary Conboy said. "When I talk to people who've made donations, I tell them, 'You might have saved six Marines' lives.'"

Adam Conboy knew he wanted to fight for his country after the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks. He was 17.

His mother told him he was too young. When he signed himself up at age 20, he sent his younger brother to give her the news.

"I said, 'There's something wrong here,'" Mary Conboy said, smiling. "'You joined the Marines, and you're afraid to tell your mother? You might want to toughen up.'"

Fellow Marines on the DVD say he did. They nicknamed him "Daddy" because at 21, he was the oldest among them and handled tense situations with humor.

Mary Conboy said she plans to continue Operation Bedding until the troops come home. Her husband, Gary Warner, built a shed in their backyard to hold donations that crowded them out of their dining room.

Charles Conboy helps pack boxes and takes them to a bulk mailing center. Mary Conboy's six other children, ages 2 to 20, also have rallied around the cause.

When Adam Conboy originally asked his mother to send 40 sets of bedding, Mary Conboy laughed, but wasn't surprised.

"It was very typical Adam," she said. "Just like when he was little. He was always the one to have all the neighborhood kids over for Popsicles."

___

On the Net:

ADAMCONBOYMEMORIALFUND

Sunday, May 20, 2007

With Memorial Day coming up.......

"I'm Tired"
BY: Joe Repya, Lieutenant Colonel, U. S. Army
101st Airborne Division

Two weeks ago, as I was starting my sixth month of duty in Iraq, I was
forced to return to the USA for surgery for an injury I sustained prior to
my deployment. With luck, I'll return to Iraq to finish my tour.

I left Baghdad, and a war that has every indication that we are
winning,
to return to a demoralized country much like the one I returned to in 1971
after my tour in Vietnam. Maybe it's because I'll turn 60 years old in just
four months, but I'm tired:

I'm tired of spineless politicians, both Democrat and Republican, who
lack the courage, fortitude and character to see these difficult tasks
through.

I'm tired of the hypocrisy of politicians who want to rewrite history
when the going gets tough.

I'm tired of the disingenuous clamor from those that claim they
'Support
the Troops' by wanting them to 'Cut and Run' before victory is achieved.

I'm tired of a mainstream media that can only focus on car bombs and
casualty reports because they are too afraid to leave the safety of their
hotels to report on the courage and success our brave men and women are
having on the battlefield.

I'm tired that so many Americans think you can rebuild a dictatorship
into a democracy overnight.

I'm tired that so many ignore the bravery of the Iraqi people to go to
the voting booth and freely elect a Constitution and soon a permanent
Parliament.

I'm tired of the so called 'Elite Left' that prolongs this war by
giving
aid and comfort to our enemy, just as they did during the Vietnam War.

I'm tired of antiwar protesters showing up at the funerals of our
fallen
soldiers, a family whose loved ones gave their life in a just and noble
cause, only to be cruelly tormented on the funeral day by cowardly
protesters is beyond shameful.

I'm tired that my generation, the Baby Boom -- Vietnam generation, who
have such a weak backbone that they can't stomach seeing the difficult tasks
through to victory.

I'm tired that some are more concerned about the treatment of captives
than they are the slaughter and beheading of our citizens and allies.

I'm tired that when we find mass graves it is seldom reported by the
press, but mistreat a prisoner and it is front-page news.

Mostly, I'm tired that the people of this great nation didn't learn
from
history that there is no substitute for victory.

Sincerely,

Joe Repya, Lieutenant Colonel, U. S. Army
101st Airborne Division