I apparently do not even take time to update my blogs very often anymore.
My grandma was in a bad car accident in May and died on May 29. Things have been just off since. A lot goes through your mind when someone passes on. Things you yourself need to make sure are taken care of...things you have not yet done......things things things things.....your brain becomes like a giant washing machine mish-mashing all those thoughts around in a huge spin cycle.
Anyway.....I really miss grandma. We all do. Of course we all think about the what ifs...like if she had not gone for the ride with her son to his appointment..she would still be alive most likely. She was a very young 91 years old. I try not to look at it that way because she did make the choice to ride along with him in the car that day......and he pulled out in front of someone and her car that he was driving was hit on the passenger side. It broke her neck, she had several hematomas in her brain.....it was just not good all the way around. She lived for 2 days after and then passed away.
We had all thought about what it might be like one day when she was no longer with us. We all knew it was going to be hard and nothing like we had ever experienced before because grandma has always been around...since we were born. Since my mom was born. Seems like forever..and part of us hoped she could be around even longer. We never got enough of grandma.
I have memories, cards, letters, photographs, voice mail, videoclips, but it is not the same as going in person to visit her and talking every Sunday afternoon. Or calling her on the phone or her calling me just to check up on me. Things are very different now.
I guess while I am slowly getting things done around here...I am a bit limited in what I have to throw out there right now.
