Saturday, April 24, 2004

Hey there. Well...our trip to Ohio was fabulous this year. We all thoroughly enjoyed our visit with everyone. The stress level was NON-existent due in large part to the fact we stayed at my grandmother's house this year. That sure brought back a lot of memories...and it was really hard to say goodbye and leave her home when the time came. I enjoyed seeing my sisters and doing things with my family too. Noah did very well and was very well behaved and did super around the dog. Course the dog also did well around him this time. Everyone commented on how well behaved he was and how he listened etc. (unlike what they say sometimes at school..weird huh?)So we all had a good time. It would be nice to be closer to do things like that more often...course sometimes when you do things like that more often they are not always as nice and as pleasant experiences I guess as when you only do them 1-2 times per year. Anyway.....more than once Dad told me how I had made a big mistake by moving to Colorado and being 1200 miles away...and not being around the family...etc...more often than 1-2 times per year. I just stood in my mind I never made a mistake and love living in Colorado!

My dad did laugh many times at my HORRIBLE pictures my one sister seemed to continue to take of me. Seems she rarely takes anything good of me....I always look SUPER huge and super fat and really bad in all of her pictures. I sometimes wonder if she takes bad pictures of me on purpose so everyone can laugh about them as it seems that is what ends up happening. My dad checked one picture out of me and I was saying it reminded me of someone. He proceeded to take a look and said "oh yeah I know...Mama Cass!". I was stunned but not surprised given the source I guess. Then my mom proceeded to say it reminded her of my dad's mother grandma Rhodehamel (who is deceased) and I look NOTHING like. So that was NOOOO compliment by any means. She was very very large and I think my dad looks like her but I don't. Then my other sister said she thought my picture reminded her of my overweight sister when she was younger and not so fat. So......quickly memories flooded my mind as to WHY I do live 1200 miles away!

ALL went well the entire time then until discussion was brought up about Noah NOT being poop potty trained or completely potty trained yet. My dad asked if I had tried SPANKING him to teach him to NOT poop in his pants...etc. I got a bit ticked off....said that was not the right thing to do...he proceeded to tell me that is what they did back in their time and I proceeded to say "things were not always done the RIGHT way back in his time"..etc. I could tell feathers were getting ruffled all the way around. I told dad we better drop the discussion about how things were handled back in his time or that would be another story entirely and I did not think HE wanted to go there. I did tell them however we have tried ALL things with Noah and that it is just he REFUSES to sit on the toilet to do his he will eventually complete potty training I guess when he is ready himself. Our pediatrician never seems worried about it and just tells us to NOT spank him or scold him but to continue to "encourage" him to go. So we are doing that. THAT was the ONLY time things kind of got out of hand I guess during my visit this year. AND it quickly reminded me of why I do live 1200 miles away. Sad.....I should not let certain things keep me from enjoying the rest of the family which I don't.

Anyway...I get back to Colorado and all is well. Dad then proceeds to tell my about my brother's weight loss so far of 31 pounds and quickly adds "you're next". What is it with him? He looked at several pics of my sister Angela who has had gastric bypass surgery and is still overweight and called them GROSS. Now how can you say that about YOUR OWN child? even as an adult? He has a problem with overweight people I guess. Seems they disgust him or make him sick...etc. Perhaps subconsciously I got overweight to displease him and to be defiant against him? haha. Who knows these days. But it would not matter if I was thin. When I was thin in the past and dressed nicely Dad said I looked like a whore. So it is a no win situation with Dad and always will be. No wonder us kids have problems. It seems dad is in competition with his own kids for many things. Anytime anyone gets anything new he has to then turn around and get the same thing or something better. It has almost become funny and absurd.

Anyway....I am doing well now. We actually had some snow the last couple of days which should help with our drought. Playing catch up for work now and trying to get things done around the house again in my spare time. The list goes on and on as usual. Haha. Keeps me busy.

My grandma had me pick something out from her house that I might want to remind me of her and grandpa. I did not know what to take or say I would like. She offered me an antique hurricane oil lamp probably worth a fortune. She had many and said many had already been sold at a prior auction. I picked one out I liked and have it at home with me now. When she asked if there was anything I wanted to remind me of her and grandpa I started to cry. She said well you are here now and I know she was insinuating in case something happened to her in the future and I could not get back or see her take something NOW. I guess plates and clocks remind me most of grandma and grandpa's house as he collected both. I like these blue plates he had collected.....and the clocks that needed wound up and tick/tocked all the time. Those were pretty nice too but she said many in the family were already fighting over the clocks. I would rather have the person around than THINGS I did not know what to tell her. So she came up with the idea for the lamp. I figure if she wanted me to have something she should decide I am happy with the lamp and when I look at it I DO think of her and grandpa. She had also made me another super nice afghan and 2 embroidered dresses scarves with crocheted trim. I LOVED my visit with my grandma and really miss her a lot. Makes me cry to think about her. I know if I DID live closer to her I would be seeing her at LEAST once per week if not more often. I don't know why others who do live closer DO NOT go see her more often than that. I have always loved visiting with her and seeing her and spending time with her. She has always made me feel so at home and welcome. I sure will miss her a lot and if anything happens to her I would miss even her home if it was sold to someone outside the family...etc.

Anyway....this is all depressing to think about so I should stop. Noah just got up and wants to play on the computer. I wish visits could go on forever but time does not stand still that long for anything these days. I guess they can go on forever in your mind but that is not the same.

While in Ohio I saw several I wanted to see...but I also did not get to see some I had wanted to see. We are planning on making a trip back at Christmas if possible so I want to see more then if I can. Well..I need to get some work done. More another time I suppose.

Keith keeps talking about buying a new house we saw that is not even built yet. I think we would be too strapped. So...doubt if we proceed. Not this year anyway.

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