What can I say? I have a lot of issues going on in my life right now...many pertaining to things regarding my health that I have to take care of. Something I don't normally have any problems with...or at least not for a very long time. One big issue dealing with my bones....so bones have been on my mind a lot. My house and things I have to do with it have also been on my mind..and wondering if my body will be able to keep up with all the requirements of things needing done around here one day. I have always been able to do anything that needs to be done and always felt I would....but I do wonder now. All the while the ever present time/clock always tick tocking in the background.
I really feel the me I used to know has died multiple deaths...and a new me always emerges.... Sometimes better...sometimes not....and then usually at some point along the way that NEW me passes on too.....and another new me shows up. I continue to change and hopefully evolve...but there are times I feel like I am being slowly erased away. I feel like I am falling/failing in multiple areas of my life right now....not really doing all I can...and yet I take refuge in my home, in my room, in my bedroom, in the comforts I surround myself with in my environment that I am also slowly changing.
I love the moon and how it always seems to look in on me and make me feel better when I see it. It grounds me. I have talked about this before. BUT right now in my life I have many journeys to face, a couple of probable surgeries, and some major life decisions to make...all the while as I continue to transform my house and STUFF as I also transform myself. ALL hopefully for the better!
2 comments:
What a wonderful writer you are. I have felt this way before.
I am praying for you--for the lovely woman you are becoming. And you are beautiful. You are.
((hugs))
thanks so much Beth
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