Friday, December 08, 2006

so much is happening.

My friend's brother passed away unexpectedly from a blood clot following surgery to remove a brain tumor....or part of one.

My mom found out she has recurrence of breast cancer in her left breast this time after 9 years of being cancer-free.

My head is much emotion. Wonder what that does to you after awhile?

I also have to wonder where I have lived for the past x number of years of my life as I cannot seem to recall some big details about specific things that I am sure I would have known at one time.

Like my friend's brother. He was the SAME age as me and my friend or his sister. Now this would seem to make them TWINS. HOW IN THE HELL could I have ever forgotten that? Especially when he also graduated with us????? I used to spend a lot of time at her house....their house......overnight even. I was involved. I don't think I went through it all only semi-present.

BUT from the things I am recalling from my past...there are times I feel like I am someone else who was placed in this family and life as I either do not recall any events or cannot remember people...........specific major events....etc. WHY would it appear that I would block so much from my memory? Why would it appear I was trying to apparently protect my mind?

or am I not who I think I am? my head is a mess.........

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