I sometimes wonder.......

I read so many inspiring stories of people who suddenly get their magic lightbulb moment and just seem to KNOW what to do to make a difference in the world....an impact....and it is big.

I sometimes certainly don't feel like I am contributing to make all that much of a large difference in the world. In my immediate environment I can hopefully have some impact and make a difference...but should that be enough or where it stops?

I always feel like I should be doing more.....I certainly want to do more for Noah and myself here and our lives now and in the future...but what else? What's next?

I don't require huge recognition or need to be famous....I just want to know what I do makes a difference and it really matters. Maybe everyone feels like that way from time to time...but it nags at me constantly. Has for years. I guess that is good because it forces me to keep plunging forward in search of......in search of all I can do to make those differences in our world.....in my world......in my life...and lives of those around me.

So often I feel like I am just spinning my wheels and losing valuable, precious time.

And meanwhile....if not careful.....if I wait too long for a fire to be lit under my ass.......I can grow stagnant.....and do nothing.....become a slug......a moldy slug......and many years from now......someone will find me......just a fossil of my former self.....